Drink Margarita’s At Tommy’s Mexican Restaurant

A date took me for margaritas to Tommy’s Mexican Restaurant in San Francisco’s Little Russia neighborhood. Tommy’s was opened by the Bermejo family in 1965. Tommy’s son Julio is recognized as one of the world’s top experts on tequila.

My margarita consisted of 100% pure agave tequila, agave syrup and fresh squeezed lime juice. The date was good but the margarita was just OK. OK enough to drink two. It would have been better to sit at the bar, get a tequila lesson, and taste a few instead of just ordering “a margarita.” What I know about tequila is to order Cazadores on a budget and never order Patrón unless you want the bartender to mock you.

The restaurant had old timey character. I didn’t eat so I can’t say if the food is any good. We sang Happy Birthday to a kid making a wish over his flan at the next table. Is it true that tequila is the only alcohol that’s an upper? I choose to believe this.


Drink Margarita’s At Tommy’s Mexican Restaurant

Purple Rain Cupcakes

Free Purple Rain cupcakes to the first 24 Prince party goers tomorrow night

Tomorrow night is the What’s in Prince’s Fridge Memorial Dance Party (wear high heels so you can feel his pain and my pain). I made Purple Rain cupcakes for the occasion.

The Purple Rain cupcakes are simple but delicious. For the chocolate cake I used a box of Duncan Hines’ Devil’s Food cake mix, a small box of instant pudding mix, 1/3 of a cup oil, a cup of whipping cream, 4 eggs, and a generous tablespoon of vanilla. The frosting is buttercream, which includes a large sack of powdered sugar, a stick of butter, a stick of butter flavored Crisco, 1/3 of a cup of whipping cream, and another generous tablespoon of vanilla.

I went to Spun Sugar and got the shiny purple cupcake papers, purple food coloring (there were at least 5 purple choices and I don’t remember which one I chose. I don’t think it matters), and the purple sprinkles. There was much hemming and hawing over what to decorate with.

There were just a few issues. My friend and co party planner D brought champagne with her and I drank a lot of it. I’m pretty sure this enhanced my baking abilities, but I never tried one. My Williams-Sonoma frosting tip was nowhere to be found. I think my friend S might have hid it so as to avoid me leaving sticky spots all over his kitchen. I had to use the star tip. The sprinkles did not want to stick to the frosting. I should have picked lighter ones I think. Sprinkling was D’s job. She made an admirable effort.

Other delicious cupcake/cake ideas:

chocolate cake and Southern Comfort butter cream topped with chocolate and salty caramel corn
chocolate Whiskey Mac cupcakes
Chocolate cupcake with salted caramel filling and vanilla bourbon buttercream
snicker doodle cupcakes
tequila lime birthday cake

Purple Rain Cupcakes

Tequila Lime Birthday Cake

FullSizeRender (64)I’m the girl that brings the spiked baked goods to people’s birthdays. I think that a birthday celebration must have something sweet to stick a candle in. How else can the birthday person make a wish? I didn’t know what kind of cake my friend R would like so I asked him what his favorite candy was. I hoped he say something chocolate but he said, “Skittles.” Skittles cake? Nope. I remembered he liked tequila and that is how the tequila lime cake was born. Yellow Skittles made an appearance.

I used a white cake mix, lemon pudding mix, egg whites, oil, vanilla, fresh squeezed lime juice and a cup of Cazadores tequila blanco. By the way, If you want to impress a bartender and don’t have a pile of money, ridicule Patron and then order Cazadores. The frosting was basic buttercream. Cream butter and butter flavored Crisco (so the frosting will behave) and powdered sugar. Add a tablespoon of vanilla. You’re supposed to put about a third of a cup of milk in the mix but I didn’t have any so I used more tequila and lime juice.

I fucked up this cake pretty badly twice. Don’t fear baking people. I wing it all the time. I thought I was using a one-cup measurer (too many swigs of tequila) when it was a two-cup. A cake mix calls for three eggs but I always use 4. This time I used 8. Whoops! Hmmm, the batter is so runny, what do I do. I ran to the store and grabbed another cake mix. I was a little skeptical so I baked one cupcake just to make sure it was edible. It was.

The next time I fucked up was when frosting. I bought that set of three tinfoil baking pans. It was going to be a three-layer cake but 85% of the way into frosting it I realized that I didn’t have enough and had to cut out a layer and scrape off as much as possible. I bake at a friend’s house and he was very happy to find the reject layer when he got home later. It made up for any sticky spots I may have left behind. I am a messy critter and even after I clean up you’re likely to find buttered handles everywhere I touched.

Frosting a cake is always annoying as fuck. That’s why people use fondant, which gives a cake that perfectly smooth look. Fondant tastes disgusting. I usually put the cake in the freezer for a bit to make it less likely to crumb up the frosting. I also smooth out the frosting with a wet knife. Decorating was super easy because I used the star tip from my Williams-Sonoma tip set. I squeezed and then plopped on the Skittles to make the flowers. I couldn’t find my cake carrier so later it got smooshed during the car ride. It was real pretty before that happened.

I gave R the leftover tequila and Skittles as presents. My friend L and I covered that cake with candles and embarrassed the shit out of the birthday boy and that’s how it should be. I got compliments.

S with the sticky spots said, “Made me think of a piña colada on the beach in cake form. Super good!” R the birthday boy said, “It was the best, no one has done anything like that for me.”

Aww, thanks friends. It was my pleasure even though I burned myself on the oven.

Tequila Lime Birthday Cake

Ted Cruz, Family Guy

Ted Cruz scares me. I don’t like Family Guy. Match. Family Guy (FG) quotes are an amalgam of several characters (mostly Peter Griffin) and Ted Cruz (TC) just says this shit of his own accord.

On condoms

TC: Last I checked, we don’t have a rubber shortage in America. Look, when I was in college, we had a machine in the bathroom, you put 50 cents in and voila.

FG: Oh look Chris, here’s your costume from the year you went as a condom.

On end of days

TC (shouted at 3 year old girl): The world is on fire! Yes! Your world is on fire!

FG: Well, I guess that’s it then. Jesus is gone.

On board games

TC: Twenty years from now if there is some obscure Trivial Pursuit question, I am confident I will be the answer.

FG: Aww man! I hate Trivial Pursuit, it always makes me feel so stupid.

On Muslims

TC: We saw the ugly face of radical Islam in Garland, Texas. Thankfully, one police officer helped those terrorists meet their virgins.

FG: No way! That’s awesome! So wait, let me get this straight: Sweet hat, obedient wife, and I get to shout “Admiral Akbar” when I do stuff? You, sir, have got yourself a Muslim.

On the legalization of marijuana

TC: I’ll buy you a tequila. Or even some famous Colorado brownies.

FG: I’m sorry Lois, we all had some pot brownies on the plane.

On marriage equality

TC: Instead of a federal government that works to undermine our values, imagine a federal government that works to defend the sanctity of human life and to uphold the sacrament of marriage.

FG: Did you hear that Meg? Guys can marry other guys now. So…this is awkward, but I mean, if they can do that, that is pretty much it for you, isn’t it? I mean you as well pack it in. Game over.

On racism

TC: It’s every bit as true now as it was then. We need 100 more like Jesse Helms in the U.S. Senate.

FG: The police are gone? Oh my god, we’re finally safe.

On crazy

TC: If standing for liberty and standing for the Constitution make you a wacko bird, then you can count me a very proud wacko bird.

FG: Oh my god, Brian, there’s a message in my Alphabits. It says, ‘Oooooo.’ No, those are Cheerios.

On religion

TC: I kind of thought it was the job of a chaplain to be insensitive to atheists.

FG: Good morning, Hebrews and She-brews. What a glorious Jewish day. Hey, how about all those coupons in the Sunday paper, huh? Some good deals there. Hey, y’know, I went into a store last week and they wanted 800 bucks for a TV, but I ussed them down to 500.

On their wives

TC (ripping off the movie American President): If you want a character fight, stick with me because Heidi is way out of your league.

FG: I walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table. I looked with a grimace at the questionable meal Lois had placed in front of me.

On abortion

TC: I intend to lead the fight in the United States Senate to defund Planned Parenthood, even while investigations continue. The time for show votes is over.  Funding the federal government does not require funding Planned Parenthood.  But basic decency and our commitment to the right to life does require that we stop taxpayer funding of abortions and any trade in baby parts.

FG: I’m here to save the unborn Brian. After they’re born they can go fuck themselves.

This is fun?

Please check out other posts in this series:

Barney on Barney on Bernie

Donald Trump and Bob’s Burgers’ Tina Belcher

Donald Trump and Adventure Time’s Lumpy Space Princess

Hillary Clinton and Disney’s Princesses

Ted Cruz, Family Guy

Meh to Yeah

It’s filled with empty stool sample containers but it’s nifty

My mood is low today. I saw my GI doctor because I have UC and am having a flare. I will be on prednisone for 6 weeks. Most of that time is the ramping down process.Weaning off corticosteroids is no joke. My adrenal glands will be very unhappy with me during each step in the tapering process. They’ve been sleeping, letting prednisone do the work and now I’m going to kick them out of bed. Overall prednisone makes me feel ill. I have good days and bad days on it. Today is a bad day.

Fortunately, I have built up tools to turn around my thinking. I waited 45 minutes at the lab to be handed a bunch of stuff to poop in. Bummer. When it was finally my turn I was tickled by the fact that these containers were collected in a snazzy purple bag. I made a joke about it to the world-weary lab lady and she laughed. I felt better.

I talked to people on the phone and texted with people who care about me. With one friend, I specifically instructed him not to try and fix anything. I just wanted him to listen to me feel sorry for myself and respond with empathic noises and words. The conversation was brief. He called me a trouper, which is something I love to hear. I felt better.

I talked to another friend and forced a chipper attitude. I made sure he knew how well I was handling my illness and my feelings about it. As I heard myself saying, “I’m lucky, it could be so much worse” I started to believe it and also feel the truth in my words. I was happy to be talking to him and catching up. The forcing eased. I felt better.

I joked with a friend at work about someone bringing Patron to her BF’s birthday party this Saturday. If I know one thing about alcohol, it’s that Patron is the kind of tequila that people think is fancy but is actually nasty. I told her that the new dress I’d ordered for the party was not going to work with any kind of bra. My Es need support. I told this to another friend and she informed me that bralessness is known as “Free Boobing.” I started singing Tom Petty, “Cuz I’m freeeeee, free boobing.” I laughed. I felt better.

Another friend texted me to say that she’d be around work until yoga if I needed her. She also sent me a couple of her favorite tracks from Rihanna’s forceful new album Anti. Listening to songs Work and Love on the Brain had me grooving at my desk. I felt better.

I’ll allow myself to crawl into my bed after work and cry if I need to. I’ll get out of my bed and go to yoga. I’ve had these types of tools around for a while (exercise, write, get out of bed, etc). The real difference now is my investment in more friendships, real ones, great ones. I’ve been down this road before but I’ve never had all these precious hands to hold.

Meh to Yeah

What to do in Oakland on Friday Night

FullSizeRender (32)
Yes, I placed that stuffed mushroom in her cleavage to take this shot

A group of my friends and I are starting out our First Friday night with a visit to Art Murmur. I started going to Oakland’s art party when I first moved here in 2007. It was great.

Then I went in 2013 around the time of the shooting, when you could buy truffles made with weed and moonshine on the street, people were packed into the cordoned off section of Telegraph, and those people were insanely drunk. The art mattered very little. It was a total shit show and I vowed not to return.

Last year I was talked into going again and it was so much better. Art Murmur is basically a bunch of open galleries, food, and sundries available for sale on the street. I’ll be back again on March 4.

This is not a post about Art Murmur, however. The most fun thing to do in Oakland on a First Friday is Hoodslam. Hoodslam is wrestling, cheap beer, too many tequila shots, and fucking great people watching. Hoodslam is Oakland. The Hoodslam website declares, “This is real!”

Hoodslam is in Oakland’s Old Opera House in the Jack London Square Area. Predrink at Heinold’s or Merchant’s. Like San Pedro, CA, Merchant’s is where you go if you want to be murdered by someone with a hook for an arm. Wait in line for a bit and then behold the wonders of Hoodslam. There are wrestlers with names like Drugz Bunny and F.O.N.G. (Fucking Obese Nerdy Gamer). There are bands with names like Broken Condoms and Cocky and Bullstinkle. Hoodlsam is a good opportunity to wear that leather bra top and show off your giant tattoo of Jim Morrison’s head.

This Friday, “Hoodslam and ArnoCorps team up to fuck you fans twice as hard once again!” It’s $20 and the show starts at 8 but runs until at least midnight. You’ll chant and jump up and down and maybe even spray Axe Body Spray into the air.

Don’t bring your fucking kids!

What to do in Oakland on Friday Night

What to do in Berkeley on Friday Night

FullSizeRender (28)WeWork Berkeley is celebrating its first birthday tonight. WeWork throws a great party (see my post about why I love having an office here). Expect free food, drinks, and a DJ. Come meet a cool group of diverse people working on diverse projects who play well together. We’ll all be amped up tonight as we haven’t had a Tequila Thursday in forevs.

Learn more about drones, videography, nail art, marijuana, financial planning, working with and for a start up, NMMNG, marketing, patents, 3D maps, Berkeleyside, raw diets for dogs, and coffee (a small sampling of what’s happening at WeWork Berkeley). Hit people up for a job. Hit on people. Eat birthday cake.

The party is tonight at 2120 University Avenue in Berkeley on the 5th floor from 6 – 9. You must RSVP. I saw some good party swag when I came into work this morning. Need more convincing? Seriously? I’ll be there.


I love WeWork Berkeley post

What the hell is NMMNG?


What to do in Berkeley on Friday Night