I Can’t Kick Myself Because My Sprained Foot Still Fucking Hurts

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I don’t look happy, but my boobs look fantastic!

Exactly one month ago, I badly sprained my ankle and foot trying to be sexy in very high heels for a man I no longer know. This Saturday it will be two months since I was ghosted by another man I (obviously) no longer know. My foot still hurts. My heart still hurts. Still feeling these hurts makes me frustrated with myself and grumpy.

I get mad at myself for not getting out there more, even as my foot hurts so much that I avoid going to the grocery store because my car is parked too far away. I go on app dates and ruminate over and chase around strangers, even as I tell myself I need a break to feel independent and my therapist tells me not to date unless it’s really worth it.

Also, I let myself gain a lot of weight (my pants’ top button is unfastened as I type). I could blame the six weeks of prednisone followed by the four weeks of not exercising (sprain), but I blame myself. How much crap exactly did I think I could shove in my face without facing consequences? Grumpy!

What’s my plan? I can’t heal my foot any faster. Dating? Ugh, I don’t want to do it. Soooo disappointing. I do have a plan to lose some weight. My friend T is going to Croatia this summer and has set for herself the ambitious goal to lose 15 pounds in two months. I’m following Tiffany’s plan and back at weekly Weight Watchers meetings. Having a diet buddy is fun. We send each other pics of our healthy lunches sometimes.

T had the dating project, then the nicer apartment hunting project, and now the Croatia in a bikini project. Clearly for both of us, vanity related problems are the easier problems to deal with.

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I Can’t Kick Myself Because My Sprained Foot Still Fucking Hurts

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